Not As Easy As It Looks
by Granuaile the Pirate Princess
Summary: Second of The Tortuga Tales. A companion to Over the Edge, Over Again. James is left with 9 year old Grace and the 3 year old twins, only to find that maybe his wife doesn't have it so easy. Jack shows up and tries to help, with amusing results.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's note: As a response to PhoenixMoon's review of the last chapter of "Over the Edge", here's the first part of an explaination as to how James and Jack ended up so chummy. Hopefully this can hold you over until I get some work done on the story featuring Grace.**

Kaylee was going crazy. Living in a house with twin three-year old sons was worse than living in a zoo; at least animals couldn't talk. "That's it!" She yelled as she swept up yet another broken glass left in the wake of her toddler terrors. "I can't take this any longer; I'm going to go insane." She sank down onto a kitchen chair, exhausted.

James wandered back from the front of the tavern to see what the ruckus was to find his wife slumped in a chair and his two sons chasing each other and hollering at the tops of their lungs. He caught them each by the backs of their shirts and swung them into his arms, then looked at Kaylee. "Honey, are you alright?"

She looked up at him. "Do I look alright? The kids are running me ragged."

James set the boys down. "Jim, Tom, go find your sister and see if she wants to play." The two boys went tearing up the stairs in search of their nine-year-old sister. James slipped behind his wife and began to rub her shoulders. "Kaylee, dear, why don't you take a little vacation? My sister still lives in Port Royal, and she hasn't seen you since the wedding. You could pay her a little visit and I could mind the children, give you a little break."

Kaylee looked up at him, and a tired smile lit up her face. "That would be wonderful, James." She stood up and kissed him. "I'll go pack right now."

No sooner had she said that than the sound of a scuffle broke out. "Mommy! Jim and Tom broke my doll again!"

"Now, make sure Grace practices her piano." Kaylee was trying to give James last minute instructions as he hurried her out the door.

"Yes dear."

"And make sure the boys take a nap promptly at two, otherwise they'll be incredibly cranky."

"Yes dear, I get it. I am their father, you know." James kissed his wife and gave her a shove out the door. "Enjoy your vacation. I love you."

She smiled over her shoulder. "Love you too!"

With Kaylee finally gone, James shut the door and turned around. He laughed to himself. Poor Kaylee, she was worried about nothing. How bad could it be taking care of his own children? Almost on cue, Grace wandered down the stairs, still in her nightgown. "Daddy? I'm hungry." Behind her came the twins, chanting, "Hungry! Hungry!"

James smiled, glad he was already prepared. "Breakfast is all ready. Come on down." They came thundering down the stairs, sounding like a herd of elephants rather than three children. James settled them all at the table and set a plate of pancakes in front of each of them.

All three of the kids' faces fell. Grace spoke first. "That's not the way Mommy makes them."

James looked at them, puzzled. "What do you mean? They're pancakes."

"But Mommy makes our pancakes bear shaped. They taste better that way."

"They taste exactly the same, now eat your breakfast."

Tom piped up. "I want bearcakes! I want bearcakes!" Jim burst out crying. Grace looked at her father like he was a moron. James was beginning to understand why his wife needed a vacation.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's note: more! I have no homework at all this weeknd, so with any luck I'll be finishing this short and starting the next story before Monday (but don't hold your breath). As always, Norry and Jack belong to the mouse. The others are mine.**

Jack had just arrived in Tortuga, and he made a beeline for the Golden Parakeet. If you'd asked him, he'd have said he kept going back there because the rum was good and cheap, but in reality, it was because he'd developed a bit of a soft spot for Kaylee and James' little whelps. He'd been hooked since the day aboard the Dutchman that little Grace had first called him "Uncle" Jack. He certainly wasn't planning on settling down and having brats of his own, but in the meantime he could spoil the little Norringtons to his heart's content. He stepped through the door and heard shrieks. Ah, good, the boys were awake. He made his way to the back, where he saw James trying to pry a rag doll out of one of the boys' hands, while the other stood in the corner and laughed. Grace stood beside her father, hopping up and down, trying to reach the doll and sobbing loudly. "Jim! Give me your sister's doll."

The boy squirming in his arms shrieked again. "I'm not Jim! I'm Tom!"

"Tom, then, hand it over." The little boy yanked again, and with a loud ripping sound, the poor doll was no more. Tom's face fell, and he dropped the torn doll to the floor and made a scramble to get away from his father. Little Grace scooped up her doll and began to wail. James picked her up and tried to comfort her, still not noticing Jack's presence. "Ahem." He cleared his throat loudly, and all three children and James looked over.

The boys rushed across the room to tackle their favorite pirate captain. "Uncle Jack! Uncle Jack! Did you bring us anything?"

Jack dislodged the twins from his person and tried to look stern. "Well I did, but I think after the stunt you two just pulled on your sister, you don't deserve a treat."

Both boys looked up at him with penitent faces. Jim spoke. "Aww, Uncle Jack, we're sorry. We didn't mean to break her doll, honest."

Jack tousled Jim's short brown hair. "As that may be, I think Miss Grace deserves to get her present first." Grace stopped mid-sniff at the mention of her name and watched Jack intently as he pulled a raven-haired porcelain doll out of the bag he carried. A smile lit up her face as she jumped from her father's arms to dangle from Jack's neck. "Oh, thank you, Uncle Jack!" She dropped to the floor with the doll and scampered off, talking to her new "baby". The two boys continued looking at him hopefully, trying to look contrite. Jack knelt down to look them in the face. "Now, Thomas, James, if I give you your gifts, will you promise to leave your sister's doll alone?"

"Yes sir!" The twins exclaimed in unison. Jack reached into his bag and pulled out two miniature ships, handing one to each boy. They stared at the new toys, amazed by the tiny masts and sails.

James spoke up from where he'd been watching. "Boys, what do you say?"

Without looking up, they spoke in unison again. "Thank you Uncle Jack."

Jack chuckled and stood to face James. "So, James, where might your lovely wife be? I've been out for some time; haven't seen a pretty face in awhile."

James gave Jack a look, and then said, "She's been gone for a few days; I sent her off to my sister's for a little rest. She should be back sometime tonight, though."

Jack chuckled. "Ah, so that's why the whelps were all in an uproar, mum wasn't about to keep 'em in line."

James bristled at this. "I can certainly control my own children." Then he looked down at the ripped doll in his hand and looked sheepish. "Well, I thought I could."

Jack laughed and clapped James on the shoulder. "Good job, man. I think you deserve a drink."

James gave Jack a sly grin. "I think you just want one, but you're right, I could use a bit of something." He went to the cupboard and grabbed two glasses and a bottle of rum. He sat down at the table and poured them each a drink. Jack sat down, and as they took their first sips, James laughed. "I've been a captain, a commodore, an admiral even… Who'd have thought that two three-year-old boys would be more difficult to control than a fleet of men?"

Jack raised his glass to him. "An' that's why I don't have none of me own."

**Oh, Jack I wouldn't be too sure about that... but that's another story. Jack and James do pretty well with the kids, but Kaylee's not home yet... still time for the twins to cause a little more havok. Please R&R, it keeps me in a writing mood.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's note: Last chapter! should be getting started on the next story soon, if i can manage to stay conscious (i'm sleepy this weekend. As always, James and Jack belong to the mouse.**

About an hour and a glass and a half of rum later, Jack and James were having an amazingly amicable conversation about the past, when Jim and Tom wandered over. "Daddy, Uncle Jack, will you play with us?"

James smiled at his sons. "Certainly, boys. What do you want to play?"

Tom grabbed Jack's arm. "We wanna play pirates!" Jim pulled on his father. "We'll be the pirates, and you can be the crew of the ship we attack."

Jack and James looked at each other, shrugged, then Jack said. "Well then, you'll never take us alive, you scurvy dogs!"

_Several hours later…._

Kaylee and James's sister Amy were walking down the streets of Tortuga toward the Golden Parakeet. "James will be so glad to see you, Amy, and wait until you meet the boys! They're absolutely adorable… when they aren't being little terrors!" Both women giggled.

"Are you sure you want me to stay with you? Sounds like you have your hands full."

"Absolutely. It'll be nice to have another woman around besides Grace!" They stepped inside the back door of the tavern, and saw Grace sitting on the kitchen floor playing with a new doll. Grace jumped up and ran to her mother. "Mommy!" She threw her arms around her mother. "And Aunt Amy!"

Amy picked up her niece. "My, my Grace, how you've grown!"

"I'm nine now… almost two whole hands!"

Kaylee interjected. "Grace, sweetheart, where are your brothers?"

"Upstairs in their room, with Daddy and Uncle Jack."

Kaylee called up the stairs. "James, darling! I'm home!" All she heard was a scuffling noise. She decided to go up and see what was going on. She peeked into the boys' room and saw both of the boys curled up on one bed, bandannas tied around each of their foreheads. Jim was quietly sucking his thumb. Kaylee smiled at her sleeping sons and was about to turn around and go back downstairs when she head the scuffling sound again and heard a muffled shout. She stepped into the bedroom, and saw Jack and her husband tied to the posts of the other bed, gags tied across their mouths. Her eyes grew wide as she ran in and unfastened James' gag. "What happened!?"

James slowly worked his jaw as Kaylee untied the cord holding him to the bedpost. "Well, the boys wanted to play pirates…"

Kaylee shook her head and laughed. "I can't leave you men alone for two minutes, can I?"

James hugged his wife and smiled. "Let's just say I'm very glad you're home."

The tender moment was broken by the sound of Jack thrashing around, reminding them that he was still tied up. Kaylee giggled and untied his hands, and he jumped up and pulled off the gag. "Gah, about time… that rum went straight through me!" He took off running for the privy.

**Please R&R!**


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